on life part i

Life is terrifying. It’s overwhelming and suffocating and threatening, it ties rocks around your ankles and drops you into the swirling mass of the ocean, adulthood presses upon you like the water closing over your head. It’s impossible to stay afloat, every attempt you make to swim is met with a more powerful current that rips you away from direction, away from your plans.

Surely it’s easier then, to just give in, to let the water close over your head and to stop. In the silence beneath the waves there is peace, that kind of still before the storm where everything is clear and clean. The dark clouds that roll along the horizon are no longer in sight, all you can see, all you can feel, is nothingness.

The relief is so all encompassing, to just let your body stop, let your mind rest, why would you not stay like this, why would you try again to swim against the never ending tide of demands heaped upon you by the responsibilities of everyday life, when you can just give in and let the silence cover you.

on the darkness, part ii

A suffocating blanket of darkness, enveloping every part of me, shrouding the light and plunging my world into perpetual night-time.

And in the night-time, the fears lurk and linger.

They creep around corners with their nails clawing at the sides of my minds, trying to pull me down to the pits of their world, to pull me under

and into the ocean in it’s ever rolling and moving dance - a beautiful, transfixing movement of water, lulling you into feeling safe, to feeling loved, before overpowering you and sweeping into your lungs, sucking out your oxygen and leaving you to drown in your darkness.

on emotions

Hot tears burn on tender eyes

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Fire in an apocalyptic sky